The stuff we don’t talk about.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I have some writer’s block going on. I have a ton of things to say, but I just don’t like it after I write it out. I don’t go back and do much editing, just a little clean-up, and that works for me. However, that is NOT how a writer is supposed to behave. So I’ve been doing some writing, then cleaning up, then editing and I just don’t like it.

So we’ll see how that goes, but for now, let’s talk about something that is bugging me.

Stuff we don’t talk about. We all have it. Family issues; personal issues; sex; politics; religion; the whole elephant-in-the-room thing. Our family is a talking family. Usually, one of us is talking over top of someone else. We always have something to say. Good or bad. Having said all that *pun* we don’t often talk about the deep, often important, stuff. We aren’t exempt from the deep, important stuff happening in our family, we just pretend it doesn’t exist. Or if it is mentioned, we all sort of stop and start backing slowly out of the room…not gonna go there.

It’s amazing how a tragedy in a family changes a family. Suddenly, we are all talking about all of the important things. I mean, what is more significant in a family than losing a child? We had to do a lot of talking; we continue to do a lot of talking. It’s like the flood gates have been opened. It’s a good thing, really, this new found love of discussing the important things. It has brought our family closer together. It has made us (that would be the “royal us” and I really mean specifically me) realize that skirting around the tough issues, the life stories that we all have, has to stop and we need to start talking.

I, for one, am more apt to ask the difficult questions to my husband, children, family and friends. More apt to say what is on my heart…get this, though…not what is always just on my mind. There is a huge difference, I believe. My mind is quick to be witty, sarcastic (no, really), often hurtful. My heart is not like that, truly. I think of it this way…measure the distance from your brain to your mouth and compare that to a stream. Pretty shallow in depth, isn’t it? Now measure the distance between your heart and your mouth. Deeper; fresher; calmer; truer.

The stuff we don’t talk about? Time to start talking about it from the heart.

Love you guys. Chat soon.

P.S. As I’m getting ready to hit “publish” on this post, I confess that I did no editing…just cleaned up some typos.

2 thoughts on “The stuff we don’t talk about.

  1. It's funny how I read what you blog about and keep nodding my head…yeah, yeah, yeah, yep, that's us! I still don't think we talk about the “deep” stuff as a family though. It's more of a one on one, which sometimes might be better!

    Nice blog, Sue!

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