Now that I am 50…or HALF A CENTURY as my youngest likes to shout in my ear (as if I’m deaf)…I am loving My Comfort Zone. It is safe; warm; comfy; just how I like it. It encompasses my whole life: food; money; clothing; my weight and health; my relationships.
Clearly it was time to shake it up a bit.
Realistically, when I review this past year, it is no surprise that I have been clinging to My Comfort Zone (the year 2011 can’t be over soon enough for my family and me). But I have been feeling the nudging to get moving. Not to forget or pretend this year never happened. But to get moving on through it; like when we walk through an unexpected spider cobweb…there is lots of flailing and thrashing and ninja moves as if our very survival depends on getting it all off of us. There are always remnant cobweb tendrils that cling to us and never seem to leave.
I don’t want to forget. I want some of the memories and feelings and lessons and pain to cling to me. After all, that is part of the purpose for this life; this unbearable agony we must endure at times. It has to be. Looking at pictures of Andy, Beth, Katie and all of those we have lost, fills me with a longing for Heaven I can not deny. Would never deny.
Not that I’m exactly ready to go. I know that I still have some things to do here, although I’m not always sure what or how or ‘why me, Lord?’
I do know, however, that I have been dragging my feet; disobeying; rebelling; and that I need to get on it. Step out. Leave My Comfort Zone.
Surprisingly, or maybe not so much, it is My Man who has given me the first real push out of the Zone. Somehow, he convinced me to give up my beloved iPhone 4 for a Droid. A DROID (aka the spawn of Satan). How or why I ever agreed to this is still a blur; but, here I am once again obsessed and consumed with learning new technology. It’s like a foreign language to me. I’ve always loved new technology…but right now, today…I’m wondering what I have gotten myself into. The Wild Boy has already suggested “we switch” phones. He has a nice Droid; but, mine is better, which is all that really matters.
I mean, seriously…what next? I burn my Republican Party Membership Card? Give up my extra-cab-Hemi-driven-gas-hogging-Ram-Truck for a hybrid?
Nothing quite so drastic. Yet. For now…I’ve become a Droid girl; I’m researching and switching to cleaner eating; I’ve penciled in regular exercise with bff, Annette and God and I are on speaking terms once again.
It’s only a matter of time before I’m driving a Prius.
Love you guys. See y’all tomorrow.