And by whining…I mean me. I’m the big whiner around my house today. Yesterday. All last week. And the week before.
I have whined about everything…the weather (too hot, then too cold, now too wet). I whined about the trees being bare and then that they changed overnight and the pollen is like sand under my contact lenses. I whined about not getting enough sleep. I whined about being so sleepy that all I want to do is sleep. But mostly, I’ve whined about my husband. For some unknown reason, somewhere along the line, I decided that I was just absolutely perfect. And he’s not. And that was all there was to it. Everything he has been saying and doing has been irking me. And I mean…IRKING. ME. What he says. What he doesn’t say. What he does. What he doesn’t do. Am I the only woman who ever feels like this? Is this why Eve ate the apple? Adam was irkin’ her that day and she decided, “hey. What the heck. The talking snake said I could be even more perfect than God! I’m already better than Adam.” And then she went for it. I could so seeing me doing that. That scares me.
I was sitting in church yesterday, completely enveloped in my righteousness and my spouse sat down next to me. Since he plays the drums during worship, I knew I wouldn’t be ‘stuck’ with him the entire service. And then the children’s sermon spoke to me. And the pastor’s sermon spoke to me. And I realized, of course, that it was God speaking to me…softening my heart…drawing me back. To Him. To my husband. Back from my neatly wrapped up little selfish world I had built.
Jesus laid down His life for us. For me. His word tells me that no greater love is there than putting down one’s life for another. Who is my ‘another’? My husband first. Our children. Family. Friends. It’s amazing to me that even though my ‘to do’ list didn’t change, my load became lighter. Even though my husband didn’t change, he didn’t irk me yesterday. I changed. I was changed. I love that.