I’ve been counting down to our annual beach week. I do that often. Lately, because we have had so much cold and snow and I am looking forward to being at the warm and sunny beach. But mostly because I do that…always looking forward.
And not doing the now.
So I started thinking about…what if I knew the moment I would take my last breath? What if I had in my home, on my desktop, a watch…whatever…what if I had a countdown clock telling me exactly how much time I had left?
…spend more time cleaning my home so I would enjoy it more? or
would I spend less time cleaning my home and more time reading a book because I enjoy that?
…put make-up on and something nicer than sweats and a tee-shirt for my husband every single day, because I want to look and feel my best for him (and for myself?)? or
not waste that time on make-up, trusting he loves me just as I am, no matter what?
…let go of the toxic people in my life as soon as I realized it, no matter who they are? or
spend more time and more energy to make that relationship work and embrace that person for himself/herself knowing that I also will be changed, for better or worse?
…spend more time making my world a better place? or
put all of my energy and focus on making my children better people?
…spend less money on cars and homes that are admittedly comfy and safe? or
spend more money on helping others?
…worry more about what is proper and considerate? or
more about the person?
…read and study the Bible more? or
just sit and pray and listen for Him more?
Do not think for a moment that I am judging or suggesting that any one this or that is better than the other. These are all things that I have been mulling over this week. For me.
I have spent way too much of the last few years worrying. Period. And regretting. I don’t want to regret anymore. I just want to do.
During my quiet time today, I realized the reason I haven’t been hearing from God lately. I haven’t been able to because of all of the clutter in my life. Not just the actual stuff. The noise. The regret. The worry. It has covered my eyes. Deafened my ears. Hindered my mouth from saying the things I should say.
Today. I am doing. Today I am returning to the Now. And to Him.
What are some of the things you are doing during this reflective season of Lent?